In this short video, I explain why the question “should I quit?” is seldom only about the job, and how we explore what lies beneath it by video.
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Online career crossroads therapy helps you when you keep asking whether this is the right job, field or working life for you, and no amount of thinking settles it. We talk one to one by video, in English, in 1-hour sessions with 50 minutes of therapy, early or late enough to fit around your working day in your own time zone.
I am a psychotherapist, not a career coach or recruiter, so I will not hand you a plan or a list of roles. I help you understand what drives the doubt, what you truly want and what has blocked it. This page sits under online identity crisis therapy within my online psychotherapy. If work is one part of a wider reckoning at 40 or 50, see online midlife crisis therapy.
When you want to move, request a free 30-minute call or find a session time. The client policy explains the terms, and you can always message me with a question.
Online career crossroads therapy is for English-speaking adults, wherever they work, who keep asking “is this really the right path for me?” and cannot find an answer that lasts. You may be thriving on paper or quietly dreading every Monday. You want to understand what the doubt is telling you before you stay, leave or retrain.
Doubts about work come from very different places, and some need a more specific kind of help. If one of these lines fits more closely, its link leads to the page that suits you.
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These reviews describe clients’ experiences of working with me. They come from my wider practice and do not all relate to online sessions. Each person’s experience is their own, and a review does not promise a particular outcome.
“Looking back over my 22 years of practice, I can think of very few people whose question about their job turned out to be only about the job. The person asking ‘Should I resign?’ is usually asking something older. One voice inside wonders ‘If I stop achieving, will anyone still rate me?’. Another insists ‘I will sort this out quietly, on my own, without anyone seeing me struggle.’ My firm view is that you should not change job until you know which of those voices is making the decision. Otherwise you risk carrying the same question into the next office.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA. I have practised since 2004 and offer online psychotherapy and couples therapy in English.
My training brings together your emotions, your thoughts and your relationships. My deep passion is the moment when what happens between you finally makes sense, to each of you and to each other. I have lived and worked in nine countries, so I know something of life across languages, cultures and borders.
Read about my background, or explore online psychotherapy and online couples therapy.
I meet regularly with experienced psychotherapists to reflect on my work, question my understanding and develop my skills. Supervision is part of the professional care I bring to individual and couples work, including online sessions.
My focus is thoughtful practice, integrity and responsibility.
You are welcome to ask about the kind of support you need.
Tell me where you are based and your time zone. We can then consider whether online sessions together are suitable.
Imran is 34, a British-Pakistani software engineer who moved from Birmingham to Amsterdam for a well-paid role 4 years ago. He was recently offered a team lead position. Since then he has slept badly. In the evenings he watches videos about teaching and woodwork, and he has quietly priced a retraining course. He has told nobody, partly because his parents sacrificed so much for his education.
I would not begin by asking Imran whether he should leave tech. I would begin with the family story behind his choice and with what the promotion has stirred up. In a first video session he would probably notice that the offer has made a long-postponed question impossible to ignore.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
You have made lists, taken tests and asked everyone you know, and the question about your work is still there every morning.
There is no right moment and no correct reason to bring a career question to therapy. A persistent sense that your working life does not fit, or that you are living someone else’s plan, is reason enough. You do not need a diagnosis, a breakdown at work or a resignation already written. In 22 years of practice I have heard this question in many forms, and I can tell a rough patch at work from a deeper crossroads that needs real attention.
I will help you understand what the doubt is about, what keeps you stuck and what needs to change before you decide. These 6 questions describe how a career crossroads tends to feel from the inside.
If it does, notice it rather than push through. The dread may show as poor sleep, a tight stomach on the way to your desk or a fog that lifts only on holiday. You still deliver, and colleagues may see nothing, but the effort of keeping going is growing.
I would look at when the heaviness began, whether it follows certain tasks or people, and whether it lifts at all when you rest. That tells us whether you need a change of conditions or a change of direction. If this is familiar, book a session with me and we can start to make sense of it.
Yes, and both are speaking for something real. One part protects your income, status and the identity you have built. Another feels it is suffocating and wants out before it is too late. Living with both, you may plan a dramatic exit one week and recommit with grim determination the next.
I do not see either part as wrong. In psychosynthesis we would listen to each as a sub-personality with its own fears and hopes. I help you understand what each one protects, so your decision is not just a victory for whichever shouted last. The aim is a choice that takes both seriously.
Many people at a career crossroads do. You ask friends, family, mentors and online forums, and every opinion pulls you somewhere new. A parent’s doubtful pause can undo weeks of thinking.
The wish for support is legitimate, and I will not shame it. What I help you change is the habit of handing the decision to whoever sounds most certain. We look at the fear underneath, often of disappointing someone or losing their regard, and you practise trusting your own reasoning a little more each week.
This is a common pattern. A new idea, retraining, a start-up, a different country, fills you with energy for a few weeks. Then the application form, the cost or a frank conversation makes it concrete, and the excitement turns into dread.
I help you slow the cycle down and notice the exact moment hope turns into retreat. Often it is when commitment would make you visible or accountable. I respect the courage it takes to imagine something different, and I will also ask you to look honestly at what the pattern costs you over time.
For many capable people, the response to doubt is to stay quiet and push harder. You take on more, answer emails at midnight and avoid conversations about the future.
My view is that this silence protects something, perhaps your pride, your role as the reliable one or a fear of being pressured. I will not shame it. I help you see what it guards, so you can share a little before the doubt becomes a private weight, perhaps by telling someone “I am not sure this is right for me any more”.
When a career has carried your sense of worth for years, questioning it can feel like questioning yourself. You may wonder who you would be without the title, the busy diary and the professional voice you put on every morning.
I would help you look at which parts of your working identity are truly yours and which you took on to please a parent, belong in a new country or prove something. I give direction and honest challenge, but I will not tell you what work to do. The aim is clarity about what kind of working life fits who you are.
If these questions fit, book a free call to think it over, or choose a session time if you already want to start.
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Tell me briefly what kind of support you are looking for.
Include your country and time zone so we can discuss whether online work together is possible and find a suitable time.
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Understanding your doubt is a beginning, but the work also has to change how you decide, speak up and spend your working days.
Working with me on a career crossroads will help you understand what your doubt is really about, see the patterns that keep you stuck or restless, and make choices you can act on.
I take an active part. I tell you what I notice, question the stories that keep you small and challenge you when you hide in research instead of deciding. These 6 questions describe what we work towards.
For men: online therapy for men after job loss or retirement. Related reading: Why does the life I built suddenly feel wrong? and Why does reaching my goals leave me feeling flat?.
I help you separate the core question from the noise around it: salary comparisons, other people’s success, the pressure to have a five-year plan. Underneath, there is often something more personal, such as a family expectation, a fear of failure or a long-buried interest that was never taken seriously.
I give you my reading of what drives the doubt and challenge explanations that keep you circling, such as “I just have not found my passion yet”. When you want to start, book a session with me and we will begin to sort it out.
You can learn to spot the moment an old pattern takes over a decision: the reflex to choose the safest option, the urge to please someone senior, the flash of panic when something feels too big. Spotting it gives you a moment to choose differently.
In our sessions I help you slow these moments down and see what they protect you from. Recognising them is the start. We then practise acting from your own judgement in small ways, such as asking for a project you want or declining one you do not, so that it carries into real decisions.
Steadiness does not mean forcing a decision or pretending the uncertainty is fine. It means staying present enough to bear not knowing, so that you can think rather than react.
I help you notice when uncertainty tips into anxiety or numbness, and what your body is reacting to. We find simple anchors that hold you through the in-between time, and I will ask you to practise them between sessions, especially on the days when work feels heaviest.
Asking clearly starts with knowing what you feel and need, and what is fair to request. Fear of seeming ungrateful or difficult can keep you silent, or make you over-explain until the request is lost.
I help you find words that are honest, specific and in proportion, whether you are asking for a change of role, flexible hours or time to retrain. I will challenge you when you swallow what matters, and also when you expect others to guess. We often prepare a real conversation, with a manager or a partner, until you can have it calmly.
Decisions clear once you separate fear, family duty, habit and status from what you actually value and know about yourself. Without that, you may freeze, ask everyone, or leap simply to end the tension.
I help you look at the likely consequences of each path and what it would ask of you financially, practically and emotionally. You get my honest view, and I will say so when you are avoiding the decision or rushing it, but the choice is yours. Often a small, reversible experiment teaches you more than another month of thinking.
It shows in ordinary weeks: how you feel on a Monday morning, how much energy you have left in the evening, whether your work and values point the same way. You may need a new role, a change in how you work, firmer limits or simply a different relationship with ambition.
Together we work out which parts of your working life to rebuild and which to keep. Sometimes the answer is a new career. Sometimes it is the same job held differently. The goal is a working life chosen by you, rather than one you are serving out of fear or habit.
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You do not need a plan, a list of options or a clear question. We start with what feels most stuck in your working life today.
When you begin, I listen closely, help you name the central question and give the work a clear direction from the first session. You do not need to have decided anything, or to justify your doubts.
Online career crossroads therapy is a focused strand of my online psychotherapy, structured individual work on your inner life and choices. If your work question is bound up with tension in your relationship and your partner is willing, online couples therapy offers long-term relational development and healing. When you know the work will take several sessions, a therapy bundle brings real savings and a plan fixed at the start.
I ask what has brought you now, what feels wrong about your current work, what you have already tried and what you secretly hope for. We may look briefly at how work and success were talked about in your family, though your full story can wait.
By the close of the session, I give you my first understanding and a suggested direction, and you judge whether my approach suits you. If you would like to talk first, a free 30-minute call is available.
Individual work fits when the question lives mainly in you: your values, your fears, your family story and the way you make decisions. Your partner and colleagues can be part of what we explore without anyone else attending.
One-to-one sessions give you a confidential space to think aloud about things you cannot yet say at work or at home. If your career is one theme among several, online psychotherapy describes my structured individual work as a whole.
Couples therapy makes more sense when the relationship itself has become the battleground. If a possible career change is causing repeated rows about money, location or roles at home, or if one of you feels the other’s ambition always comes first, working together often helps more.
In couples sessions I help you both see the cycle between you and own your part in it. Online couples therapy is long-term relational development and healing, and some people sort out their own position first before bringing their partner in.
The pace depends on how urgent the decision is, how much pressure you are under and how much continuity you need. If a deadline is looming, such as a job offer, closer sessions help you think before you sign.
I usually suggest weekly or fortnightly sessions at first, and I will tell you honestly when the spacing should change. Back-to-back sessions over a few days can suit people with demanding travel schedules or a decision that cannot wait.
A bundle makes sense when you already know the work will need several sessions and you want continuity rather than a fresh decision after each one. Career questions often feel clearer for a week and murkier the next, and a planned course carries you through both.
Paying for a set in advance cuts the cost per session and gives the work a clear frame. I can help you judge whether a bundle fits. The sizes and savings are on therapy discounts and bundles.
Therapy has done its job when you have more ownership, clarity and freedom of choice, and the question of your work no longer dominates your thoughts. You may still be carrying out a change, but you are doing it calmly and on purpose.
We review progress together, and I do not encourage indefinite therapy. Sessions can become less frequent, pause or end. Coming back at a later crossroads is normal in a long working life, and it does not mean the earlier work was wasted.
Not sure this is your starting point? Here is how online career crossroads therapy compares with the options people doubting their work most often consider.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Online career crossroads therapy (this page) | You keep asking whether this is the right work for you and want to know what drives the doubt. | Weekly 1-hour video sessions at first |
| Online identity crisis therapy | You feel lost in yourself across your whole life, not mainly at work. | Weekly 1-hour video sessions at first |
| Online midlife crisis therapy | Your work doubts are part of a wider reckoning at 40, 50 or 60. | A steady course of video sessions |
| Online burnout therapy | You are too exhausted to tell whether the job is wrong or you are simply spent. | Video sessions at a gentle pace |
Online career crossroads therapy with me is individual psychotherapy by video, in English, for adults who keep doubting their work and cannot settle the question. It helps you understand what drives the doubt, what you genuinely want and what has stood in the way.
I work in depth, with your values, your family history and the parts of you that pull in different directions. You will find it under online identity crisis therapy, one branch of my online psychotherapy.
Come when the question is costing you sleep, energy, relationships or the ability to make decisions, or when it has lasted months despite your efforts. Your own sense that something does not fit is reason enough.
I look at how long the doubt has lasted, whether it is spreading into the rest of your life and whether you keep postponing a decision that matters. When those are present, it deserves proper attention, ideally before a rushed resignation rather than after.
Yes, though not by making the choice for you. Therapy helps you separate fear, duty and habit from what you truly value, so that the choice becomes yours. I cannot promise a sudden answer, and I would be wary of anyone who did.
In my clinical experience, people often find that the question “which job?” hides an older one, such as whose approval they are still working for. I would focus with you on that underlying question, because once it is clearer, the practical decision usually becomes much simpler.
It depends on what is stuck. If you know what you want and need help with CVs, interviews or a job search, a coach is a good choice. If you keep circling the same question and cannot tell why, psychotherapy usually helps more.
I work with what lies beneath the career question: the fears, loyalties and patterns shaping your choices. Some people see me first and a coach later.
Both are ways of feeling safe when your worth seems to depend on your work. Some people move towards others, seeking praise, saying yes and over-delivering. Others withdraw, keep their heads down and handle everything alone.
I help you see which way you move, what each move protects and what it costs you. Then we work on steadier options: asking for recognition or support directly, and taking space without cutting yourself off from colleagues who could help.
We start with what feels most stuck. I ask about your current work, the moment the doubt became loud and what you have already considered. I also ask a little about how your family viewed work and success. By the end you will have my first reading and a proposed direction.
You do not need to prepare or arrive with clear options. Book a first video session or begin with a free call.
Plan for a focused course over a few months rather than a couple of sessions. That is often enough to understand what drives the doubt and take a first deliberate step. If the question is tangled up with family expectations or a long-held identity, it may take longer.
My 22 years of practice have taught me that career questions respond to a defined block of sessions with a review at the end, not to open-ended talk. We decide together at each review whether to continue, meet less often or stop.
Yes. Sessions run from early morning to evening Copenhagen time, 7 days a week, subject to availability, and the booking calendar shows every slot in your own local time.
You need privacy, headphones and a stable connection. Please do not join from an open-plan office, where colleagues might overhear. If you are unsure whether the times will work for you, we can check on a free call.
Career crossroads work is individual psychotherapy, booked as 1-hour online sessions with 50 minutes of therapy. My prices page gives the session fee in US dollars, so you can plan it like any professional expense.
If you expect several sessions, a therapy bundle saves you 10 per cent and gives you a structured plan while you work out your direction. The options are on therapy discounts and bundles.
Pick a session time in the calendar, or ask for a free 30-minute call if you want to talk it over first.
If no time suits, or a decision has suddenly become urgent, such as a job offer with a short deadline, write to me. I hold some room for acute cases, usually a time within days, and acute online psychotherapy explains it.
You can also send me an email
I want therapy to help you understand your experience and make choices you can use in everyday life. We pay attention to feelings, needs and the responses that happen before you have time to think.
Our online room should offer enough trust and honesty to explore what is difficult. I bring attention and professional judgement. You bring your experience, questions and the right to say when something does not fit.
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