In this short video, I explain how we steady an emotional storm in the first acute sessions by video, and why we listen to the feeling before deciding anything.
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Acute EFT online psychotherapy helps you when something has just happened and your feelings have become too strong, too chaotic or suddenly absent. It is short-term, emotion-focused therapy for one person, by video and in English, with 1-hour sessions of 50 minutes of therapy placed close together while the storm is at its height.
I help you slow the wave of feeling, find which emotion is doing the most work and see what it needs, so you can get through the coming days with your judgement intact. This is the acute strand of EFT online psychotherapy, within my online psychotherapy. If you would rather plan a concentrated block, back-to-back EFT online psychotherapy fits better.
When the feelings are raw, the simplest step is to take the earliest acute time. You can also ask for a free 30-minute call, check the client policy or tell me briefly what has happened.
Acute EFT online psychotherapy is for English-speaking adults, anywhere in the world, whose feelings have been thrown into chaos by something that has just happened. You need help within days, by video, to calm the storm enough to think and to understand what it is telling you.
Acute work is built for the first days and weeks after an emotional shock. If one of these fits better, the linked page will help you more.
You can also send me an email
These reviews describe clients’ experiences of working with me. They come from my wider practice and do not all relate to online sessions. Each person’s experience is their own, and a review does not promise a particular outcome.
“Many of the people I meet by video in the first week after a shock believe they are falling apart. Usually they are not. Their feelings are doing exactly what feelings do when something huge happens too fast, and the fear of the feelings becomes a second crisis on top of the first. In that week I hear one voice asking ‘Will anyone stay with me through this, or am I on my own?’, and another saying ‘Leave me be, I will sort it out when I can think.’ Both deserve room. My strong view is that the first job is not to make the feeling go away. It is to make it bearable enough that you can listen to what it is trying to tell you.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA. I have practised since 2004 and offer online psychotherapy and couples therapy in English.
My training brings together your emotions, your thoughts and your relationships. My deep passion is the moment when what happens between you finally makes sense, to each of you and to each other. I have lived and worked in nine countries, so I know something of life across languages, cultures and borders.
Read about my background, or explore online psychotherapy and online couples therapy.
I meet regularly with experienced psychotherapists to reflect on my work, question my understanding and develop my skills. Supervision is part of the professional care I bring to individual and couples work, including online sessions.
My focus is thoughtful practice, integrity and responsibility.
You are welcome to ask about the kind of support you need.
Tell me where you are based and your time zone. We can then consider whether online sessions together are suitable.
Finn is 44, Irish, and works for a shipping company in Rotterdam. On a Thursday his younger brother is taken to hospital after a fall, and Finn cannot get a flight home until the weekend. Since then he has felt numb in the daytime and wakes at 3 in the morning shaking. He snapped at his manager, apologised, then hid in the car park. He tells his partner he is fine and does not believe a word of it.
In our first video session, I would help Finn slow down that 3 a.m. moment and find what is in it. He would most likely discover a fear for his brother, and an old guilt about leaving home, both held down so hard they come out as shaking.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
Something has just shaken you, and the feelings it set off are bigger than anything your usual ways of coping can hold.
You do not need a perfect reason or the right moment to ask for acute help. If a recent event has left your feelings out of control, or switched them off, that is enough. You do not need a diagnosis or a clear account of what happened. In 22 years of practice I have sat with many people in the days after a shock, and I know when emotional upheaval needs immediate attention.
In acute sessions I usually begin by helping you find a little ground under your feet, then we look at the strongest feeling and what it is asking for. These 6 questions may help you decide whether to reach out now.
If so, act on it. You may lie awake, forget to eat, lose the thread at work or startle at your phone. Simple tasks such as answering an email or making dinner feel enormous, because most of your energy is going into holding yourself together.
I would look at what changed, when, and which feeling is draining you most. That helps us tell a natural reaction that will settle from one that is getting worse. If the days are slipping away from you, book an acute session with me this week.
After a shock, these urges often arrive together, because each serves a need. One part wants to pour everything out and be understood. Another wants to keep it locked away until it feels less dangerous. You may phone a friend, then cut the call short.
I help you honour both. We go at a pace where you can say what matters without being swept away, and we stop when the protective part needs us to. Neither urge is wrong. Each one tells us what you need to feel safe enough to keep going.
In a crisis, waiting can feel unbearable. You refresh messages, read into short replies and need to hear again and again that things will be all right. Any silence feels like a threat, and the relief from reassurance fades within minutes.
That need for contact is real, and I will not make you feel foolish for it. I help you reach the fear driving the checking, often a fear of being left alone with something too big, and find steadier ways to ask for support. We also look at what reassurance can and cannot give you right now.
Plenty of people in shock feel this. A friend comes round and within minutes you feel crowded. They leave and you feel abandoned. You might send a long message late at night, then regret it by morning. It can make you feel you are going mad, and you are not.
I slow these swings down with you so we can see what tips you from wanting comfort to wanting escape. Often it is a feeling of being looked at too closely while you are raw. We find a way for you to accept support in amounts you can actually take in.
Some people do not cry or rage after a shock. They organise. They become efficient, flat and far away, and they may worry that something is wrong with them for feeling so little. Others around them may even admire how well they are coping.
My view is that this numbness is protecting you, and it deserves respect rather than pressure. I help you approach what lies underneath it gradually, without forcing tears that are not ready. Bit by bit, you can let some of it in without being flooded.
A shock can knock out the beliefs you stood on: about your safety, your choices, the people you trusted or the kind of person you are. Shame or self-blame may rush into the gap. You may feel you no longer recognise yourself, which is a frightening place to be.
I help you separate what happened from what it seems to say about you. I will challenge harsh conclusions you reach in the first days, but I will not hand you a new story. In time we look at what the event has changed and what is still truly yours.
If this is where you are, take the next acute time in the calendar, or ask for a call if you want to check the format first.
You can also send me an email
Tell me briefly what kind of support you are looking for.
Include your country and time zone so we can discuss whether online work together is possible and find a suitable time.
You do not need to explain your whole story in your first message.
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In the first days, steadying comes first, understanding comes second, and big decisions wait until you can think.
Acute emotion-focused work with me will help you calm the immediate overwhelm, understand which feelings are driving you and take practical steps to get through the next days. Understanding alone is not enough in a crisis. You also need things to be different by Friday.
In 22 years of practice I have learned that in acute work I need to be more active than usual. I set a clear structure, tell you what I see and steer us back when panic pulls us off course. The 6 questions below show what we aim for.
Related reading: How do I deal with a feeling that feels too big?.
After a shock, everything feels urgent at once. I help you separate the event itself from the reactions piling up on top of it: the sleeplessness, the anger at others, the voice saying you should be handling this better. Often one core feeling sits underneath, such as grief, fear or humiliation.
I tell you what I notice and which feeling I think needs attention first. I will also question stories that make the crisis bigger than it is, or smaller. If you are ready, book a session with me and we start there.
Waves of feeling in a crisis usually have warning signs: a memory, a place, a time of day, a tightening in the throat. Once you know your signs, you get a few seconds to brace, breathe or step away.
In our sessions I help you map those signs and what tends to trigger them right now. Then we practise what to do when a wave starts, on screen and between sessions, so you have something you can use at 3 in the morning when I am not there.
Steadying yourself in a crisis is not about making the feeling vanish. It means staying present enough to know where you are and what you will do next. A few simple anchors, used every day, make a real difference.
I help you find anchors that fit you: something for your body, something for your thoughts and someone to contact. We test them together, and I will ask you to use them between sessions. That daily practice is what carries you through the hard hours.
In a crisis, it is hard to know what you need, let alone say it. You may accept help you do not want, refuse help you do want, or say nothing and hope someone guesses.
I help you find a few plain sentences for the people around you: what helps, what does not and how much contact you can manage. I will challenge you if you keep silent to spare others, and also if you expect them to read your mind.
Strong emotion makes everything seem final. You may want to quit, leave, move or confront someone today. Some decisions really cannot wait, but many can, and choices made in panic are often regretted.
I help you sort what must be decided now from what can wait until you are steadier. I give you my view of the risks and ask hard questions where I see you rushing, but the choice stays yours.
Once the feelings are bearable again, there is often a deeper question: why this hit you so hard, and what it has stirred from earlier in your life. Some people need new boundaries, routines or support around them after a crisis.
I help you decide whether to stop, pause or continue. Many people move on to steady EFT online psychotherapy to work through what the crisis uncovered. The aim is a life that has room for what happened.
You can also send me an email
You do not need to make sense of it before you come. You only need to book a time and tell me what happened.
When you begin, I listen to what has happened, check how you are coping day to day and help you find the feeling that needs attention first. We agree on a simple plan for the coming days before the session ends.
Acute work is the short, urgent end of my online psychotherapy, structured individual work that can continue once the crisis eases. If the shock is mainly between you and a partner who will join, online couples therapy offers long-term relational development and healing. If you expect several sessions in a short time, a therapy bundle gives you savings and a plan you do not have to rethink each day.
I ask what happened, how you are sleeping, eating and working, and which feeling is hardest to bear or most strangely absent. We then decide what matters most this week: steadying yourself, a decision, a boundary or a difficult conversation.
Before we finish, you will have my first reading of what is going on and a few concrete steps for the days ahead. You can then judge whether this helps. If you want to check first, ask for a free 30-minute call.
Individual acute work fits when the crisis lives in your own emotions: your shock, grief, fear or shame, and how it is affecting your days. We can talk about the people involved without them joining.
I give you structure, continuity and honest challenge from session to session. Once things calm down, online psychotherapy offers the longer, structured individual work if you want to go deeper.
Couples therapy is the better choice when the crisis is in the relationship itself: an affair, a threat to leave, a fight that keeps escalating, trust that has broken. In that kind of crisis, the repair usually asks for both of you on the call.
In couples work I help you see the cycle between you, own your parts and rebuild safer ways of relating. Online couples therapy is long-term relational development and healing. Some people steady themselves in acute individual sessions first, then begin couples work.
In the first week or two, sessions usually need to be close together, so you are not left alone with the same overwhelm between them. How close depends on how severe things are and how much support you have around you.
I often suggest 2 sessions in the first week, then weekly as things settle. I will tell you plainly if I think we need to meet more often for a while, and when it is safe to space out.
A bundle makes sense when it is already clear that you need several sessions in a short time. In a crisis, deciding and paying session by session is one more task you do not need.
A bundle reduces the cost of each acute session and gives you the reassurance of time already set aside. You can see the choices on therapy discounts and bundles and in the cards below.
The acute phase is over when you can sleep and work again most days, when the feelings no longer knock you over without warning, and when you can think about the future instead of only getting through today.
I review this with you openly and do not keep acute support going longer than needed. We may stop, space out or move into longer work. Coming back if something else happens later is always possible.
Not sure acute emotion-focused work is right for you? This table sets acute emotion-focused help beside its 3 nearest alternatives.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Acute EFT online psychotherapy (this page) | Something has just happened, and your feelings need help within days. | Video sessions close together at first |
| EFT online psychotherapy | There is no new shock, but feelings you want to understand and change over time. | Weekly 1-hour video sessions |
| Back-to-back EFT online psychotherapy | You want a planned block of emotion-focused sessions over a few days. | Several sessions in one block |
| Acute online psychotherapy | You are in crisis and want broad support rather than an emotion-focused start. | Video sessions close together at first |
Acute EFT online psychotherapy is short-term, emotion-focused therapy by video, in English, for one person whose feelings have been thrown into turmoil by a recent event. It helps you steady the overwhelm, understand which emotion is driving you and get through the coming days with clearer judgement.
I hold some room in my calendar for acute work, usually a time within days. It is the crisis strand of EFT online psychotherapy.
Come when a recent event has left you unable to sleep, work or think straight, or strangely empty. Your own sense that you cannot hold this alone is reason enough.
I look at how much has changed since the event, whether you are getting steadier or worse, and what support you have. If the feelings are growing rather than easing after a week or two, it is time.
No. The first days are often when help makes the biggest difference, because it can stop the overwhelm from hardening into something longer. You do not need to have processed anything first. I cannot promise how quickly things will ease, but I can help you through them.
In my clinical experience, people often wait until they feel calmer before reaching out, and suffer longer than they need to. I would focus first on getting you through the nights and days, then on what the feelings are saying.
Then you cry, and that is fine. Tears are not a problem to solve in this work. They often carry exactly what needs attention.
I keep an eye on whether the feeling is helping you or flooding you, and I slow things down when it is too much. You will not leave a session without some way to steady yourself first.
When you are in shock, your need for comfort and your need for protection can switch places quickly. Closeness soothes, then feels like pressure. Distance helps, then feels like abandonment. It is a very human response to overload, not a sign that something is wrong with you.
I help you notice what tips you from one to the other, and find ways to ask for support in amounts you can take. That makes it easier for the people around you to help.
We start with what happened and how you are now. I help you find some steadiness in the session itself, then we look at the most pressing feeling and agree a few concrete steps for the days ahead.
You do not need to prepare or tell the story in order. Book an acute session or, if you want to talk first, request a free call.
Plan for a short series over a few weeks rather than a single session. Often 3 to 6 sessions are enough to steady the crisis and decide what comes next. Deeper or older pain stirred by the event usually needs longer work afterwards.
In 22 years of practice I have found that a clear plan, reviewed after each session, helps more than an open-ended promise. We decide together when the acute work is done.
Yes. For many people in crisis, being able to meet from home, without travel, makes it possible to start at all. It also means you can keep going if you have to fly somewhere suddenly. All it asks of you practically is a room where nobody can listen in, a pair of headphones and reliable internet.
If you are unsure whether video is right for you right now, or whether acute online psychotherapy without the emotion-focused frame would suit better, we can sort it out on a free call.
Acute work is individual psychotherapy, booked as 1-hour online sessions. You can find the current fees in US dollars on the prices page.
Because acute work usually needs several sessions close together, a therapy bundle is often worth it. It saves you 10 per cent and gives you a set plan. The options are on therapy discounts and bundles.
Book the earliest acute session in the calendar, which shows times in your own time zone, and write a line about what has happened. A free 30-minute call is also possible if you want to check first.
When the next free time is too far off, write to me and I will give you an honest answer about how soon we can talk. This is psychotherapy, not an emergency service, so if you are in danger, turn to the emergency services where you live. Otherwise, book now and we will begin.
You can also send me an email
I want therapy to help you understand your experience and make choices you can use in everyday life. We pay attention to feelings, needs and the responses that happen before you have time to think.
Our online room should offer enough trust and honesty to explore what is difficult. I bring attention and professional judgement. You bring your experience, questions and the right to say when something does not fit.
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