In this short video, I explain how one person working alone can shift a neurodiverse relationship, and what our hour together looks like.
You can also send me an email
Online neurodiverse couples therapy alone is for one person, anywhere in the world, whose relationship is shaped by autism, ADHD, AuDHD or a similar profile, in you, in your partner or in both. You join by video, on your own, at an hour that suits your time zone.
We look at the pattern between you and your partner from your side: what sets it off, what you do, what it costs you and what you can change. Your partner does not have to agree, take part or even know the details. When one person in a relationship moves, the dance between two people moves too.
This page belongs under online neurodiverse couples therapy, which is for couples who take part together. There are also pages focused on ADHD, autism and AuDHD for one person alone. You can ask for a free 30-minute call, book an hour, read my client policy or write to me.
Online neurodiverse couples therapy alone is for one person, taking part on your own, whose relationship is shaped by autism, ADHD, AuDHD or a similar profile in either of you.
If one of these fits you better, the linked page is probably a closer match.
You can also send me an email
These reviews describe clients’ experiences of working with me. They come from my wider practice and do not all relate to online sessions. Each person’s experience is their own, and a review does not promise a particular outcome.
“With the neurodiverse couples I work with, I often meet one partner first, on their own, and I keep seeing how much that one person can shift. Under the surface, some are asking ‘Will you ever meet me halfway?’, and others ‘If I show you how hard this is for me, will you still respect me?’. Once you can hear that question in yourself, and guess at the one your partner is asking, the old arguments start to lose their hold.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA. I have practised since 2004 and offer online psychotherapy and couples therapy in English.
My training brings together your emotions, your thoughts and your relationships. My deep passion is the moment when what happens between you finally makes sense, to each of you and to each other. I have lived and worked in nine countries, so I know something of life across languages, cultures and borders.
Read about my background, or explore online psychotherapy and online couples therapy.
I meet regularly with experienced psychotherapists to reflect on my work, question my understanding and develop my skills. Supervision is part of the professional care I bring to individual and couples work, including online sessions.
My focus is thoughtful practice, integrity and responsibility.
You are welcome to ask about the kind of support you need.
Tell me where you are based and your time zone. We can then consider whether online sessions together are suitable.
Lukas is autistic and works as an engineer in Zurich. His wife, Hannah, wants to talk through feelings every evening, and he freezes. She calls him cold. He feels he can never get it right. Hannah has refused couples therapy twice, saying Lukas is the one who needs help.
Lukas joins online, alone. We map what happens in his body when Hannah starts a feelings conversation late at night, and he learns to say, in one sentence, that he wants to talk and needs it to be tomorrow morning. Hannah notices the change. A few months later she asks whether she could come too.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
You cannot change your partner. You can change how the two of you meet.
Sometimes only one person is ready to work on the relationship. That is not a dead end. Working alone gives you room to think at your own pace, without having to manage your partner’s reactions in the same session.
Online neurodiverse couples therapy alone is a calm hour where you can take apart what keeps happening at home and decide what you want to try next.
Your partner may feel blamed by the idea of therapy, or simply not see the point. You still feel the strain every day.
You can start anyway. We work with what you can influence, and many people find that the atmosphere at home changes long before their partner ever joins.
If you are autistic, have ADHD or are AuDHD, you may be tired of every row ending with you as the one who needs fixing.
Here we look at the pattern, not at what is wrong with you. Your way of thinking is part of the picture, and so is your partner’s.
If your partner is the one whose mind works differently, you may feel lonely, confused or simply exhausted from trying to guess what they need.
We make sense of what is going on for them and for you, so you can stop guessing and start choosing how to respond.
A video call with your partner and a therapist on screen can be a lot of input, and a lot of pressure. For some people, a quiet hour alone is the only way to think clearly.
That is a good enough reason to start here.
Some people want to understand their own reactions, history and limits before they work on the two of them together. That makes later joint work far more useful.
We give your side of the story the full attention it needs.
You may be asking whether this relationship can work for you in the long run. That is a real question, and it deserves room.
I will not push you in either direction. I help you see your situation clearly enough to decide for yourself.
Recognise yourself? Book an hour, ask for a call or just send me a short email.
You can also send me an email
Tell me briefly what kind of support you are looking for.
Include your country and time zone so we can discuss whether online work together is possible and find a suitable time.
You do not need to explain your whole story in your first message.
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Your side of the pattern is the part you can actually work with.
In online neurodiverse couples therapy alone, we work out how the loop between you runs, which parts of it belong to you and which small changes on your side are most likely to shift the whole thing.
You leave each hour with something concrete to notice or try.
We pick one typical hard moment and walk through it step by step from where you stand: what you noticed, what you felt and what you did. Then we guess, carefully, at what your partner may have been experiencing.
Yes. A relationship is a system. When one person responds differently, the other usually responds differently too, even if nobody talks about it. We plan small, safe changes and watch what happens.
Yes. We practise putting a need into one clear sentence and choosing a good moment to say it. That is useful whether you are the direct one or the one who tends to hint.
Yes. Understanding how your partner’s mind works does not mean giving up your own needs. We look for the place where you can be kind to them and fair to yourself at the same time.
Often, yes. Many people carry years of moments that went wrong long before anyone understood why. Looking back with what you know now can soften old blame, towards your partner and towards yourself.
Usually: fewer moments where you feel lost or attacked, more confidence in what you need and a home that feels a little more predictable.
Some people then invite their partner into joint sessions. Others find that their side of the change is enough.
You can also send me an email
You do not need a label, and you do not need your partner’s permission to look after the relationship from your side.
In the first hour I get to know how you think and take in information, what is happening at home and what you hope will change. If something else would help you more, for example online psychotherapy for your own anxiety or low mood, I will tell you.
Your first hour of online neurodiverse couples therapy alone is calm and unhurried. You tell me about your relationship and one typical hard moment, and we start to map the pattern. You leave with one or two things to notice before we meet again.
Yes. You can keep your camera off for a while, write in the chat instead of speaking, take breaks, sit in your own lighting or send me notes before we meet. I can also send a short written summary afterwards.
Yes, if you both want that. Some people move on to online neurodiverse couples therapy together after a while. We plan that step carefully, so your partner does not feel ambushed.
Often every week or two at first, then less often as things settle. We agree the rhythm together, and it can change.
Work on your own usually runs over several weeks. A therapy bundle lowers the price per hour and gives the work a clear plan. You can see the bundle cards further down.
You understand your own reactions better, you misread your partner less often and home feels calmer. At that point we review together whether to carry on, invite your partner or stop.
Not sure which page fits? Here are the closest options.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Online neurodiverse couples therapy alone (this page) | You take part alone; any neurodivergent profile. | 1 hour, every week or two |
| Online neurodiverse couples therapy | Your partner takes part too. | 2 hours, every second or third week |
| Online ADHD couples therapy alone | ADHD is the main theme. | 1-hour sessions on your own |
| Online autism couples therapy alone | Autism is the main theme. | 1-hour sessions on your own |
It is individual work by video, in English, focused on a relationship shaped by autism, ADHD, AuDHD or a similar profile. You take part alone, from wherever you live, and we work on your side of the pattern between you and your partner.
Both. It suits the neurodivergent partner who is tired of being blamed, and the partner who feels lonely or confused. Many people who come are neurodivergent themselves and their partner is too.
No. A hunch is enough to start. We work with what you notice in daily life, not with paperwork.
Yes. You are not talking behind your partner’s back. You are looking after your part of something you share. I keep the focus on what you can do, not on building a case against them.
No. That decision is yours. I help you see your situation clearly, so that whatever you choose rests on real understanding rather than on exhaustion.
Yes. If one profile is central, see online ADHD couples therapy alone, online autism couples therapy alone or online AuDHD couples therapy alone.
No. Assessment and medication belong with doctors and specialist services where you live. My work is the relationship and your part in it.
It varies. Some people find a clear shift within a handful of sessions, others want support over a longer stretch. We review it regularly.
Sessions alone are 1-hour online sessions. Current fees, in US dollars, are on my prices page, and a therapy bundle saves you 10 per cent.
Book an hour in the calendar, which shows times in your own time zone, or ask for a free 30-minute call first. If writing is easier than talking, send me a message.
You can also send me an email
I want therapy to help you understand your experience and make choices you can use in everyday life. We pay attention to feelings, needs and the responses that happen before you have time to think.
Our online room should offer enough trust and honesty to explore what is difficult. I bring attention and professional judgement. You bring your experience, questions and the right to say when something does not fit.
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P.S. I’ll call you in a bit!
