In this short video, I explain how one-to-one sessions can steady you after an affair, when you live far from family and old friends.
You can also send me an email
Infidelity therapy alone, living abroad, is one-to-one online support after an affair, whether you were betrayed or you were the one who strayed. It is for people outside their home country, Danes abroad included, with nobody close by to lean on. We meet by video, in English, in your time zone.
It belongs to couples therapy for couples living abroad. If your partner is willing to take part, infidelity couples therapy, living abroad works with you both.
You can ask for a free 30-minute call, book a session, read my client policy or write to me.
Infidelity therapy alone, living abroad, is for one partner after an affair, whether you were betrayed or you had the affair. You take part on your own, by video.
One of these pages may suit you better.
You can also send me an email
These reviews describe clients’ experiences of working with me. They come from my wider practice and do not all relate to online sessions. Each person’s experience is their own, and a review does not promise a particular outcome.
“In my clinical experience, people facing an affair alone abroad hear two different questions in their heads. Those who were hurt often ask ‘Was I ever really enough?’, and those who strayed ask ‘Can I be forgiven, or is it safer to disappear?’. Some swing between ‘Don’t leave me’ and ‘Get away from me’ in the same evening. Far from home, without the people who know you best, those questions get louder. Giving them a calm place to be spoken is usually the first thing that helps.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA. I have practised since 2004 and offer online psychotherapy and couples therapy in English.
My training brings together your emotions, your thoughts and your relationships. My deep passion is the moment when what happens between you finally makes sense, to each of you and to each other. I have lived and worked in nine countries, so I know something of life across languages, cultures and borders.
Read about my background, or explore online psychotherapy and online couples therapy.
I meet regularly with experienced psychotherapists to reflect on my work, question my understanding and develop my skills. Supervision is part of the professional care I bring to individual and couples work, including online sessions.
My focus is thoughtful practice, integrity and responsibility.
You are welcome to ask about the kind of support you need.
Tell me where you are based and your time zone. We can then consider whether online sessions together are suitable.
Maja is Danish and has lived in Lisbon with her Portuguese husband, Tiago, for six years. She has found messages showing that he had an affair with someone from his gym. Her parents in Aarhus tell her to come home at once. She is not sure. Tiago says he wants to stay, but refuses couples therapy.
In our online sessions, Maja first gets her sleep and her footing back. Then she looks at what she wants to know, what the relationship was like before, and what staying or going home would mean for her. Three months on, she has a clearer picture, and Tiago has asked whether he could join a session.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
An affair turns your world over. Far from home, it can feel as if you are carrying it completely alone.
Abroad, there may be no sister on the sofa, no old friend to call at midnight, no one who knew you both before. The shock has nowhere to go.
Infidelity therapy alone gives you a private, steady place to put it down and think.
Finding out can leave you numb one hour and furious the next. Sleep goes, work suffers, and the people around you may not even speak your language.
We start by steadying you, before any big decisions.
If you had the affair, you may feel guilt, relief, fear and grief all at once, with no one you dare tell.
Here you can look at what happened honestly, without being condemned or excused.
Your partner may refuse couples sessions, or you may not be ready to face each other on a screen yet.
You can still begin. What you understand on your own will shape whatever comes next.
Some people replay the messages, the dates and the lies for weeks. The mind keeps searching for the missing piece.
We work on quieting that loop, so you can sleep, function and think again.
Families back home may have firm views about honour, forgiveness or divorce. Their voices can drown out your own.
We make room to hear what you want, separately from what others expect.
Living abroad adds a question few others face: if the relationship ends, do you stay in this country or go home?
We look at the relationship, the country and the children, if there are any, one at a time.
If this is where you are, request a call or book a session. Writing to me first is fine too.
You can also send me an email
Tell me briefly what kind of support you are looking for.
Include your country and time zone so we can discuss whether online work together is possible and find a suitable time.
You do not need to explain your whole story in your first message.
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First you find your feet. Then you decide.
In infidelity therapy alone we steady the shock, make sense of what happened and give you space to choose your next step, without rushing it.
We look at the story of the affair and of the relationship before it, so that you can see it as more than a single betrayal or a single mistake.
Yes. We use simple ways to calm your body and your thoughts, so that the next conversation with your partner does not happen at the height of panic.
Yes. Some details help you heal, others only hurt. We think through which questions you really want answered, and why.
Yes. Accountability and self-hatred are not the same thing. We work on owning what you did in a way that helps repair rather than just punishes.
Yes. We set out the options side by side, including the practical and family sides of staying abroad or going home, and give you time to weigh them.
For most people it means feeling like yourself again, knowing what you want, and being able to look back later on how you handled it.
You can also send me an email
You do not need to have decided anything. You only need to want help.
In the first sessions of infidelity therapy alone, I listen to what happened, how you are coping and what you need most right now. If another kind of help would fit better, I will say so.
It lasts one hour, by video. You tell me what you have discovered or done, how you are sleeping and functioning, and what weighs on you most. We end with one thing to hold on to this week.
With curiosity and respect. I ask what faithfulness, forgiveness and divorce mean in each of your backgrounds, and I do not treat any one view as the standard.
Yes, if you both want it. Some people move into joint infidelity sessions once the first shock has passed. Others keep working alone.
Often weekly at first, while things are raw, then less often as you steady.
Working through an affair usually takes a number of sessions. A bundle sets out that plan and lowers the price per session. The bundle cards below show the options.
You sleep better, the replaying eases, and you can think about the future without panic. We review together when to slow down or stop.
Not sure this is your page? These are the closest options.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Infidelity therapy alone, living abroad (this page) | You face an affair alone, far from home. | One-hour online sessions, often weekly at first |
| Infidelity couples therapy, living abroad | Your partner will take part too. | Two-hour online sessions |
| Online infidelity therapy alone | Life abroad is not part of the picture. | One-hour online sessions |
| Divorce therapy alone, living abroad | You have decided to separate. | One-hour online sessions |
Infidelity therapy alone is one-to-one online sessions, in English, for one partner after an affair, when you live outside your home country. It is for the person who was hurt and for the person who had the affair.
Both. Some people come because they were betrayed. Others come because they had the affair and want to understand it and take responsibility. I work with each of you separately and fairly.
Yes. Even if your partner never joins, what you understand and decide on your own changes how you move forward.
No. I will help you think it through honestly and safely, but the decision to stay or leave is yours.
No. What you tell me stays between us, within the limits set out in my client policy. If your partner joins later, we agree together what is shared.
Yes. Danes abroad and partners of Danes are welcome. We work in English, wherever you live.
No. Whether you were hurt or you had the affair, you deserve to be understood. I will be honest with you, and I will not condemn you.
It varies. Some people need a few sessions to steady themselves, others want support through a longer period of decisions. We review together.
Sessions on your own last one hour. You can see current fees, in US dollars, on my prices page, and a therapy bundle saves you 10 per cent.
Choose a time in the calendar, which shows your own time zone, or ask for a free 30-minute call first. You can also write to me.
You can also send me an email
I want therapy to help you understand your experience and make choices you can use in everyday life. We pay attention to feelings, needs and the responses that happen before you have time to think.
Our online room should offer enough trust and honesty to explore what is difficult. I bring attention and professional judgement. You bring your experience, questions and the right to say when something does not fit.
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P.S. I’ll call you in a bit!
