In this short video, I describe what acute online couples therapy alone looks like when you join me by yourself straight after a blow, and where we begin.
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Acute online couples therapy alone is for you when your relationship has just been hit hard and your partner will not take part, has left the home or has just announced it is over. We meet by video soon, in 1-hour sessions, at an hour that suits your time zone, wherever you live.
Together we get you calm enough to rest, function and reflect, sort out what is going on and pick your next move with a clear head. It is the solo form of acute online couples therapy, and sits within my online couples therapy work.
You can ask for a free 30-minute call, book a session, read my client policy or write to me.
Acute online couples therapy alone is for you if your relationship has just been shaken and you are facing it by yourself. Your partner has said they want to leave, has gone quiet, has moved out or will not join. You want help now to get steady and think clearly.
Acute online couples therapy alone is for one person in the first raw weeks. If something else fits better, follow the link.
You can also send me an email
These reviews describe clients’ experiences of working with me. They come from my wider practice and do not all relate to online sessions. Each person’s experience is their own, and a review does not promise a particular outcome.
“When someone comes to me alone, straight after the floor has gone, I rarely start with the relationship. I start with them. Shock makes people do two things at once: hold on tighter and push away harder. You may text your partner twenty times and then swear you never want to see them again, all in one evening. Underneath, there is usually one question: ‘Am I going to be all right?’ My first job is to help you answer that with a cautious yes. Once you are steadier, you will make far better choices about the relationship than you could in the first week.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA. I have practised since 2004 and offer online psychotherapy and couples therapy in English.
My training brings together your emotions, your thoughts and your relationships. My deep passion is the moment when what happens between you finally makes sense, to each of you and to each other. I have lived and worked in nine countries, so I know something of life across languages, cultures and borders.
Read about my background, or explore online psychotherapy and online couples therapy.
I meet regularly with experienced psychotherapists to reflect on my work, question my understanding and develop my skills. Supervision is part of the professional care I bring to individual and couples work, including online sessions.
My focus is thoughtful practice, integrity and responsibility.
You are welcome to ask about the kind of support you need.
Tell me where you are based and your time zone. We can then consider whether online sessions together are suitable.
Noor lives in Dubai and has been with Sam for eight years. One evening Sam tells her he has met someone else and needs time to think. He moves into a hotel the next day. Noor stops eating, checks his social media through the night and drafts long messages she deletes at dawn. Her sister says leave him. A friend says fight.
In our first online session we leave the big questions alone. We plan the next three days: food, sleep, one person she can call and one short message she wants to send Sam. By the end of the week she is still hurting, but she is no longer acting out of panic.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
Everything has just tipped over, and you are holding the pieces by yourself.
Acute online couples therapy alone covers the first raw stretch after a blow you are carrying alone. Your partner may refuse, may be far away, or may be the one person you cannot face at the moment.
At this stage people seldom need relationship tips. They need a calm person to think alongside, so that fear stops running the show.
‘It’s over.’ ‘I need space.’ Words like these may come without warning or confirm a fear you have carried for a long time. Both ways, the shock is real.
We take in what was said, slowly, so you neither beg, lash out nor promise things you cannot keep.
Chats, pictures or a secret bank account can shake your trust in everything, your own judgement included.
We sort what you truly need to learn, how to raise it and how to protect yourself while the facts emerge.
A partner staying elsewhere, or at home but saying nothing, leaves you with nobody to work things through with.
In our sessions we try to read that silence and decide whether to make contact, and in what way.
In the morning you are frantic; by lunch, numb. Both are ordinary reactions to shock, and both wear you out.
I explain what your body is doing and help you find small, workable ways to get through each day.
Friends, family, colleagues: all of them have a verdict. Walk away. Hold on. Wait and see. All that advice can bury what you yourself feel.
Here you get a quiet space to hear yourself, with someone who has nothing riding on the outcome.
It can feel as if money, housing, the children and the relationship itself must all be settled today.
We pick out the few things that really cannot wait, and let the rest sit until you are steadier.
Recognise yourself? Request a call or book a session, and we will begin with this week.
You can also send me an email
Tell me briefly what kind of support you are looking for.
Include your country and time zone so we can discuss whether online work together is possible and find a suitable time.
You do not need to explain your whole story in your first message.
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Steady yourself first. Understand second. Decide last.
Acute online couples therapy alone keeps to that sequence. Coping comes first, then a clear look at events between you and your partner, then your wishes and the real options.
We sketch a short plan for the coming days: rest, meals, the people you lean on, and the lines you will hold with your partner.
Having a plan gives you something firm underfoot.
Yes. In shock, many people send the long message in the middle of the night, scroll through their partner’s accounts or issue ultimatums they regret.
You learn to notice the urge and let it wait until morning.
Together we find a few plain, honest sentences for your feelings and needs, so your only choices are no longer saying nothing or exploding.
Your partner’s choices are not yours to control. Your own conduct, your requests and your limits are.
Seeing where that boundary runs often brings relief.
After the first wave, we explore which way you lean: rebuilding, pausing or releasing. There is no rush to know.
Some people go on to online couples therapy alone to continue the work from their end. Some invite their partner into joint sessions. Some move towards separation. Whichever way you go, you go there on purpose.
You can also send me an email
No plan or perfect phrasing needed. Logging in is enough.
Our early sessions are about your story, how you are holding up and getting you through the week.
Should another form of help fit better at this moment, you will hear that from me.
It is a one-hour video session. We cover the events, your sleep and appetite, and the people around you.
We close with a short plan to carry you to our next meeting.
Both happen a lot in shock, and neither means something is wrong with you. We look at what helps you through the worst hours, and if it does not ease, we talk about what extra support would help where you live.
I try to hold some space for people in this position, but a time is only certain once I have checked. Grab the earliest slot or request a call, with a sentence about the situation.
For a few weeks, acute online couples therapy alone usually runs at a quicker rhythm. As you regain your balance, the gaps widen.
Times like these often call for several sessions close together. A bundle means a plan from the outset and a reduced cost each time. The bundle cards below show the options.
Nights bring sleep again, workdays are possible, and thoughts of the relationship no longer flood you. At that point we look further ahead.
Wondering whether this page fits? Compare it with its nearest neighbours.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Acute online couples therapy alone (this page) | Your relationship has just been shaken and you are facing it by yourself. | 1-hour sessions, frequent at first |
| Acute online couples therapy | Your partner is willing to take part with you. | 2-hour sessions, frequent at first |
| Online couples therapy alone | No fresh blow; you want to change your part of the pattern. | 1-hour sessions every few weeks |
| Online infidelity therapy alone | An affair is the main wound, and you are working through it alone. | 1-hour sessions |
Acute online couples therapy alone is short, structured work by video for one person in the immediate aftermath of a relationship blow, with a partner who is absent or unwilling. We steady you, make sense of events and plan your next move. It is offered in English to people in any country.
Yes. You are my client, and the relationship is what we work on. However your partner responds, the way you get through these weeks shapes you and anything that comes next.
No one can promise that, and I will not coach you to pressure anyone. I can help you act in a way you will be proud of later, and that is also the best chance for repair if repair is possible.
That is up to you. Some people tell their partner, some keep it to themselves. We can weigh up which feels right and safe in your situation.
I am firmly with you, and I will also be honest. That sometimes means pointing out what you are adding to the problem. You deserve that honesty more than easy comfort.
Then we can look at bringing them in. Often the next step is joint acute online couples therapy or online couples therapy. What you have built in your sessions alone carries over.
Not for our sessions. You join from wherever you are, and the calendar shows times in your own time zone. Distance can make the shock harder to bear, and we take that into account.
It differs from person to person. A handful of sessions steadies some people; others prefer close support for a month or more. We check in after each meeting.
Sessions alone last one hour, online. Current fees, in US dollars, are on my prices page, and a therapy bundle saves you 10 per cent.
Book the earliest open session directly, or ask for a free 30-minute call if you would like to talk first. If nothing is early enough, write to me with a line about what has happened.
You can also send me an email
I want therapy to help you understand your experience and make choices you can use in everyday life. We pay attention to feelings, needs and the responses that happen before you have time to think.
Our online room should offer enough trust and honesty to explore what is difficult. I bring attention and professional judgement. You bring your experience, questions and the right to say when something does not fit.
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P.S. I’ll call you in a bit!
