In this short video, I talk about what makes separation harder when you live abroad, and how we can keep it humane.
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Divorce therapy, living abroad, is online help, in English, for couples ending their relationship far from where they grew up. Beside the grief come hard questions: who stays, who leaves, where the children live and how to tell families in two countries. By video, in your time zones, we work through them fairly.
It combines online divorce therapy with my work for couples living abroad. If only one of you will take part, divorce therapy alone, living abroad is the place to start.
You can ask for a free 30-minute call, book a session, read my client policy or write to me.
This page is for couples living abroad, anywhere, who have decided to separate or are deciding how. Both of you take part, together or from two places.
This page is for separating couples abroad who take part together. If another line fits better, follow its link.
You can also send me an email
These reviews describe clients’ experiences of working with me. They come from my wider practice and do not all relate to online sessions. Each person’s experience is their own, and a review does not promise a particular outcome.
“Having lived and worked in nine countries myself, I know how much of a life abroad rests on the relationship that brought you there. When it ends, everything shakes at once. Beneath the practical arguments, the partner who wants to leave is often asking ‘Can I go home without losing my children?’, while the one who stays is asking ‘Will I be left here with nothing?’. Both questions deserve an answer. When they are heard, fair decisions become possible, and so does carrying on as parents together.”
Mark Colclough, MA, psychotherapist and EFT couples therapist
I am Mark Colclough, MA. I have practised since 2004 and offer online psychotherapy and couples therapy in English.
My training brings together your emotions, your thoughts and your relationships. My deep passion is the moment when what happens between you finally makes sense, to each of you and to each other. I have lived and worked in nine countries, so I know something of life across languages, cultures and borders.
Read about my background, or explore online psychotherapy and online couples therapy.
I meet regularly with experienced psychotherapists to reflect on my work, question my understanding and develop my skills. Supervision is part of the professional care I bring to individual and couples work, including online sessions.
My focus is thoughtful practice, integrity and responsibility.
You are welcome to ask about the kind of support you need.
Tell me where you are based and your time zone. We can then consider whether online sessions together are suitable.
Ingrid is Danish and Raj is from India. They have lived in Singapore for eight years and have a daughter of six. They have decided to separate. Ingrid wants to move back to Denmark. Raj, whose work is in Singapore, fears he will become a stranger to his daughter. Every conversation ends in tears or silence.
In our online sessions, we slow the talks down and put their daughter at the centre. Ingrid admits how isolated she has felt for years, and Raj admits how frightened he is. With that said, they start to sketch a plan for school, holidays and long visits that both can accept.
I have presented this clinical example as a compound of 22 years of clinical practice.
Ending a relationship is hard anywhere. Doing it far from home asks even more of you both.
Abroad, a separation can unpick everything at once: home, visa, friends, work and the children’s daily life. Often one partner wants to go back home while the other has built a life where you are.
Divorce therapy, living abroad, gives you a calm, structured place to talk it through before decisions harden into battles.
Going home may feel like the only way forward for one of you, and like abandonment to the other. Both feelings make sense.
We look at the wish to leave and the fear of being left, side by side, so neither has to win by force.
School, language, grandparents, a home in one country or two. These questions are painful, and they need answers both of you can live with.
We put the children’s needs at the centre and plan from there.
If the relationship was the reason one of you moved, the split can leave that person without work, friends or a clear right to stay.
We name that vulnerability openly, so it can be taken into account.
Families in different countries may take sides, judge or simply not understand.
We plan what you will tell them, together, so the children are not caught in the middle.
When neither of you is a native speaker, tense talks can go wrong over a single word. I slow things down and check meaning, so you argue about the real issue.
Being a good parent from another country takes planning, trust and a working relationship with your ex-partner. We build that while you still can.
Is this where you are? Request a call or book a session. Either of you can take the first step.
You can also send me an email
Tell me briefly what kind of support you are looking for.
Include your country and time zone so we can discuss whether online work together is possible and find a suitable time.
You do not need to explain your whole story in your first message.
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You cannot avoid the pain of an ending. You can avoid making it worse than it needs to be.
In divorce therapy, living abroad, we work on how you talk, how you decide and how you look after the children. The aim is an ending that both of you can stand behind later.
I set a clear structure for each session, keep turns fair and step in when old fights take over. That keeps the hard talks going instead of collapsing.
Yes. Grief, guilt and anger are part of every separation. We make room for them, so they do not take over practical choices.
We look at schooling, language, holidays, travel and contact with both families. I do not decide for you. I help you reach plans you can both keep.
Yes. If one of you stays alone in a country that was never quite home, we look at what support, work and friendships could carry you through.
We plan the message together, including what the children hear and when, so families in different countries get one calm story.
A good ending means clear agreements, children who feel safe with both of you and enough respect left to cooperate for years to come.
You can also send me an email
You do not need to agree on everything before we meet. You only need to want a fair ending.
In the first sessions of divorce therapy, living abroad, I hear from both of you, map where you agree and where you are stuck, and set a plan for the questions that matter most.
You join for two hours, by video. We cover the story of the relationship, the decision to separate, the children and the practical questions about where each of you will live.
Yes. Many separating couples no longer share a home, or one has already moved. Each of you can join from where you are.
It varies. Some couples need a handful of sessions to agree on the essentials. Others want support over months while the move unfolds.
Often every one to three weeks, more often around big decisions. We plan around travel and time zones.
If you expect several sessions, a bundle fixes the plan and lowers the price per session. The bundle cards further down show the options.
You have workable agreements, the children have a clear picture of their future and you can talk without the old fights taking over. Then we stop, or meet now and then.
Not sure divorce therapy, living abroad, is your page? These are the closest options.
| Option | Choose it when | Pace |
|---|---|---|
| Divorce therapy, living abroad (this page) | You are separating abroad and both take part. | 2-hour sessions every one to three weeks |
| Divorce therapy alone, living abroad | Only one of you will take part. | 1-hour sessions on your own |
| Couples therapy for couples living abroad | You still hope to stay together. | 2-hour sessions every two to three weeks |
| Online divorce therapy | Living abroad is not the issue. | 2-hour sessions as needed |
Divorce therapy, living abroad, is online support, in English, for couples who are separating far from home. It helps you make fair decisions about homes, countries and children while handling the grief and conflict that come with any ending.
It deals with everything ordinary divorce therapy covers, plus the questions that come with living abroad: who stays, who moves, how children live across borders and how families far away are told.
Yes. We put the children at the centre and work through school, language, holidays, travel and contact. You decide. I help you reach plans you can both keep.
That is very common. We look at both positions honestly. Sometimes the work becomes about whether to separate, and sometimes about how.
No. I am a psychotherapist, not a lawyer. For legal questions about custody, residence or moving abroad with children, please speak to a family lawyer in the country concerned. I help with the human side.
Yes. Every session I offer through this site is held in English.
It depends on how much you need to settle and how much conflict there is. Many couples find a few focused sessions enough to agree the essentials.
Together, where it is safe and both of you are willing. Separate sessions can help when one of you needs to think alone first. If there is any fear of violence, joint sessions are not the right format.
Sessions are 2-hour online couples sessions. The current fee, in US dollars, is on my prices page. Buying a bundle of sessions in advance takes 10 per cent off.
Either of you can book a time. The calendar shows hours in your own time zone. If you would like to talk first, ask for a free 30-minute call.
You can also send me an email
I want therapy to help you understand your experience and make choices you can use in everyday life. We pay attention to feelings, needs and the responses that happen before you have time to think.
Our online room should offer enough trust and honesty to explore what is difficult. I bring attention and professional judgement. You bring your experience, questions and the right to say when something does not fit.
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P.S. I’ll call you in a bit!
